


Y2Kisses

by Shoulder_Devil



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Enemies to fake dating to still enemies, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, New Year's Eve, Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:33:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21868318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shoulder_Devil/pseuds/Shoulder_Devil
Summary: Gertrude and Elias attend a New Year's Eve bash with the intention a little light theft. Their cover? Recently engaged couple.
Relationships: Elias Bouchard/Gertrude Robinson
Comments: 21
Kudos: 56
Collections: Rusty Quill Secret Santa 2019, Soft Elias Fics





	Y2Kisses

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nightmaremagnet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightmaremagnet/gifts).



“Dammit,” Gertrude practically spits.  
  
Elias has barely a second before she shoves him roughly against the wall. The relationship with his Archivist has been strained for years. Forced pleasantries atop a dance of mutual subterfuge. Her choice to attack him directly, _now_ of all times is a genuine surprise though. 

Her kiss catches him wholly off guard. Not a chaste thing given to one sentenced to die; Gertrude's kiss is rough and hungry, biting at his lips. The hands Elias expects to close around his throat or crack his head against the metal door frame instead plunge into his hair and pull tight, tilting his head back for a better angle. 

The tread of heavy boots draws closer and with them her plan falls into place. It’s embarrassing really, how long it takes him to put the pieces together. Moments ago he’d heard the elevator settle on this floor but said nothing as Gertrude smoothed over the evidence of her tampering. She had broken into Simon Fairchild's office in Canary Wharf to retrieve a Leitner rumored to be in his possession. Elias was curious as to how she would handle the situation but didn’t expect her plan to involve her pulling loose his bow tie and working free the buttons on his shirt. 

Gertrude abandons his lips in favor of kissing along the line off his jaw. “For christ's sake, Elias, _play along!”_ she hisses before closing her teeth around the flesh of his earlobe. She bites hard enough to draw out a hiss of pain but he doesn’t pull away. 

Security is just on the other side of the door, he might as well put on a good show for them. “If you insist,” breathes out with a low chuckle, leaning in to meet her lips with his own. He tightens his arm around her waist, pressing her closer while the other hand scratches down her back. He slips a strap of her dress down her shoulder just as three security staff burst in armed with flashlights and nightsticks. 

The two of them break apart like guilty teenagers caught necking in a supplies closet, faces flushed and out of breath. The largest of of the security team, a broad shouldered man with a patch on his chest identifying him as Philip, approaches them while the others scan the office for signs of disturbance. 

“What are you doing up here?” Philip demands. 

Elias paints his face with a look of surprise he does not feel and clears his throat. Before he can speak, Gertrude interjects. “My fiance and I, we, um--” she ducks her head in a sheepish laugh and tucks a strand of errant hair behind her ear. 

“I wanted to show her the view.” Elias gestures to the floor to ceiling windows of the corner office. “Lovely, isn’t it?”

“It really is. I’ve never seen the city from this high up before. It’s lovely.” Gertrude presses against his side and smiles up at him. If he didn’t know better, he would think his Archivist may harbor feelings other than spite and loathing for him. She really is a remarkable actor and it would seem the guards were buying her ruse. 

Philip shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “It’s lovely enough five floors down with the rest of the party.” 

“Of course.” Elias makes a show of collecting his composure and fixing his shirt. “There’s really no need for Simon to hear about our little tryst, is there? ” He presses a few bills into the guard’s hand. “I sincerely hope for your _discretion_ in the matter.” 

Philip pockets the money smoothly and nods to the other two guards. “Nothing out of place then?”

A tall woman with dark hair pulled back in a bun clicks off her flashlight and puts it away. "Not that I can tell, boss.” 

“Then I think we’re done here.” 

As Gertrude and Elias head for the elevators Philip shouts after them. “Next time find a bathroom or a maintenance closet or something.” 

Gertrude gives him an embarrassed smile and pushes the button to call the lift. 

As the doors close Elias hears him grumble to the others, “What is it about posh people and an open bar?”

* * *

“Your tie is crooked,” Gertrude comments without looking over to Elias.

“You’ll have to forgive me, I was rather in a rush. No thanks to you.” Elias pulls on his tie but Gertrude swats his hands away and adjusts it herself. She tightens it more than is necessary but his pride won’t allow him to loosen it while she is watching. 

“Thanks to me the book has been replaced with a much more… benign volume. And we left the office without alerting Mr. Fairchild to our activities.”

He fires a sidelong look in her direction. “I seem to recall playing a pivotal role in that turn of events.” 

“He would never have accepted the bribe if he suspected us as thieves.” 

She’s right, of course, not that he will ever admit it to her. “That bribe is coming out of your year end bonus by the way.” 

She scoffs. “As if your budget had room for a year end bonus for me or anyone else not on your board of directors, Elias.”

“Perhaps,” he admits, “but now you’ll never know for sure.”

The elevator door opens and she walks through without looking back. Elias takes the opportunity to loosen his tie before following after her. “You’re not planning on leaving are you? It’s almost midnight”

She narrows her eyes suspiciously but doesn’t respond. 

“I very well can’t have my _loving_ _fiance_ abandon me at such an auspicious event. We’ll leave right after the fireworks, darling. I promise.” 

“I’m sure you can find a way to enjoy ringing in the new millennium with Simon Fairchild and his assembled guests. I have work to do.” 

“That work wouldn’t have anything to do with Adelard Dekker, would it?” 

Gertrude’s face freezes for a split second before shifting to curiosity. “Why would you say that? Dekker wouldn’t be able to afford an invitation. In fact, I find myself curious how _you_ managed to justify the cost, _darling_. Isn't the Institute a non-profit?” 

“Knowing the right people has always been one of my talents.” He gives her a winning smile. “It would seem you have the same talent. And a talent for dodging my questions. ” If he didn’t know to look for it, Elias wouldn’t have recognized the subtle clench of her jaw. “Or perhaps I was mistaken and I didn’t recognize him posing as a member of the wait staff.” 

“You aren’t getting any younger, Elias dear. Perhaps you should have your eyes checked, I think a pair of reading glasses would do you good. In fact, I think I know just the frames to suit your face.” 

The frames in question are a recent acquisition to Artefact Storage and while stylish are quite deadly. Elias smiled tightly, acknowledging the threat as she threaded her way to the bar.

* * *

“One minute!” The call goes out over the assembled guests. The large clock above the stage ticks forward, counting down the last moments of the twentieth century. 

Gertrude has slipped away but Elias isn’t worried. It’s easy enough to find her at the edge of the crowd when he looks. She is chatting with Dekker, of course, in what passes for a secluded alcove in the vast ballroom. Elias isn't the only one looking for Gertrude as Philip spots her and begins to draw the wrong conclusions. _Can't have that._

He snags two flutes of champagne from a passing server and works his way over.

“There you are, darling.” Elias offers her a glass, ignoring Dekker entirely. “What will people think,” he tsks, “chatting up the staff. We don’t want our new friend to get the wrong impression, do we?” He flicks his eyes to the left where Philip has spotted them.

She takes the offered glass and smiles just as the crowd starts counting down to the new year. “And what do you intend to do about it?” Gertrude challenges through her teeth. 

“Play along,” he whispers, leaning in for a kiss as a chorus of Happy New Year erupts around them.

He expects her to retaliate but doesn’t expect her to do so by deepening the kiss and sliding her tongue into his mouth as a challenge. Elias considers escalating their competition further but decides dipping Gertrude would draw too much attention. Making them look _more_ suspicious would defeat the purpose so he breaks the kiss and allows Gertrude her victory.

From the smile she gives him he doesn’t doubt she would rather have slid a knife between his ribs. Perhaps one day she may even try, or even get Dekker to help. Won’t that be an exciting day. He looks forward to the new millennium and all its promises.

**Author's Note:**

> Competitive kissing with Elias and Gertrude

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] Y2Kisses | written by Shoulder_Devil](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22411342) by [Tipsy_Kitty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tipsy_Kitty/pseuds/Tipsy_Kitty)




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